An Idea That Could Be Funny

==> check out devices deployed by your server player!

==> Check Devices

It seems Reed has deployed a few strange looking constructs. After taking a look in your game menu, it seems they're called the CRUXTRUDER, TOTEM LATHE, ALCHEMITER, and the PUNCH DESIGNX. There also seems to be a HOLOPAD deployed that will show you what you're alchemizing as to not waste grist. Isn't that neat? You silently thank your somewhat edgy friend.

==> Equip Lassokind

Smart thinking! You scutter back to your room to root around for anything that could be denoted as a lasso. After locating a length of woven rope (the closest thing you really have), you make the necessary knots to form the tightening part of a lasso, and drop it into your SPECIBUS. Boom, LASSOKIND! You're quite proud of that one.

With your new lasso, you decide to try snapping up any items near by. And by items, you mean another imp or two. With a mighty swing, you slam the creatures into the sand, or the jutting pieces of steel sticking up from the sand. They explode into grist, which you heartily absorb. Perfect.

Marty Robbinsprite flashes a thumbs up, even quick-drawing a few other imps to assist. You got some more grist out of it, though!

With said grist, you get an idea. By use of your alchemister, you create…

THE YEEHAWITRON

It’s a cowboy hat that acts as a computer via transmitting images directly to your brain! Your thoughts are also sent out as text. Yeesh, you better get a handle of your internal filter first.

NOW WE'RE TALKING.

After doing some searching around your house and the immediate area around your home, you bring your haul of knick knacks up to your alchemiter. It’s binging time. Well, only after you take some imps out and gather one heck of a lot more grist! After accumulation, you get to work ALCHEMIZING!

Cowboy Hat && Metal Beam = Metal Cowboy hat. It’s real heavy. Even the YEEHAWITRON isn’t this heavy, and it has actual computer bits and processors, fans included in that thing. Maybe you can use it as a weight during leg day squats?

GENOCIDAL ROOMBA && Metal Cowboy Hat = BIGGEST IRON. Looks to be the roomba… but now it has metallic cowboy legs fit with boots, and two tiny arms with which to pick up stuff and move it around. BIGGEST IRON seems to take a liking to the original captchalogued roomba, and the two scuttle off to clean, probably. How adorable.

Marty Robbins “GUNFIGHTER BALLADS” Poster && T Shirt = T Shirt poster. It just dressed Marty Robbins in that boring old T shirt you picked out. (Well it was a Blink 182 t-shirt but I digress.)

T Shirt && Marty Robbins “GUNFIGHTER BALLADS” Poster = Gunfighter Outfit. Huzzah! Your hypothesis seems to be correct! You’ve alchemized yourself a perfect set of Marty Robbin’s gunslingin’ clothes, which you promptly put on. With the exception of the hat. Only Marty Robbins can wear that perfect hat. You stow it away in your captchalogue for safe keeping.

Metal Shards && Lasso = ROSE OF SHARON. Seems you made yourself the perfect spikey lasso, there! Additionally, it seems to fire off metallic thorns / spikes when you use it, and it can crush an imp in it’s sharp grip! Perfect.

Dad’s Barber Razors && Cowboy Hat = Buckaroo’s Jackknife. A rather large jackknife, sheathed in crisp black leather with a handmade quality to it. The blade itself is just… your dad’s razor. Though, this gives you an idea.

ROSE OF SHARON && Buckaroo’s Jackknife || Marty Robbins Poster = Texas Red’s Got you DEAD. The handle of this whip resembles the handle of a Colt Walker albeit shaped to fit the typical hilt structure of a snakewhip. While lacking the typical lasso knot, the initial whip flick reveals the literal razor sharp internal blades, springing from the internal body of the whip to deal insane stab and lashing damage. And, appearing to respond to though, it ties itself into a perfect lasso knot on it’s own when required, delivering an even more devastating crush / stabbing combo to whatever finds itself in it’s grip. Of course, you immediately allocate Texas Red’s Got you DEAD to your strife specibus, with ROSE OF SHARON falling in line as a backup.

Toy Capgun && Marty Robbins Poster || Blink 182 Poster = UNHOLY MATRIMONY. The unholy union of emo pop and country western make this devastating weapon hilariously overpowered. Well, if it was a real gun. Taking the form of a false Colt Walker with a pitch black hilt (with the addition of blue and pink spray paint in various symbols relating to both artists), it fires off the cap with a booming sound followed by a brief snippet of what can best be described as emo western, or country pop. Your perfect dream. It scares the imps, a perfect stun weapon for you to attack with Texas Red’s. As such, you make a secondary CAPGUNKIND card.

Your dad halts you mid binge, looking about as he sweeps up the grist you gathered from the imps off your floor and into a pile beside your alchemiter. He briefly remarks about being proud of your choice in weapon. In response, you give him Buckaroo’s Jackknife–which he allocates to his RAZORKIND specibus. Well, with him here… you both decide to make some items together! Father-kind bonding time.

Dad’s Apron && Virginia’s Tie-Dye Willie Nelson shirt || Marty Robbin’s Hat = Country man’s Combat Apron. Your father equips the thick black leather apron, emblazoned with Willie Nelson’s face in a bright pink and neon yellow combination. While he may not enjoy these artists as much as you, he will always enjoy your various art projects, and is happy to model it off. He gains the additional pockets / captchalogue space of the apron pockets.

Buckaroo’s Jackknife && Metal Beam || Country Man’s Combat Apron = Buckaroo’s Buster Sword. It comes with an impossibly long leather sheath that hangs off the user’s hip, and when flipping the blade out of the wooden blade holder, the blade itself is just an… impossibly large approximation of a barber’s razor. Still pretty damn impressive though.

Your dad halts you there. Seems like he’s comfortable with this stuff so far! He easily lifts up his new weapon.